As a decade concludes and I reflect upon the people, places and experiences of this world and the great beyond, I am filled with wonder and the joy of possibility. So much has transpired across the eons of time. Laughter and tears. Tragedy beyond measure. All amplified as I rest in my cocoon like a caterpillar, a chrysalis ready to morph and bloom.

Pay attention to the signs that are everywhere. My nephew turned 30 on the 27th, born on the same day his uncle Jamie, my late husband, turned 35. I remember closing on our first home that day, holding the keys destined to open new doors of possibility, barely pregnant with our first child. As I assembled my nephew’s birthday present, a mysterious skeleton key etched with 7g was found hidden in the recesses of a woven bag from Thailand. How did this get here? What does it mean?

My late husband’s birthday was November 27th so every few years his birthday landed on Thanksgiving. As the holiday season approaches, I tune into the joy of holiday traditions along with the trauma that may surround them. I was the original chef for the NY AIDS charity God’s Love We Deliver.